Stay at Home Dad: Biblical?

    It has always been assumed that in a biblical marriage the wife is submissive to the husband and that he is head of the household. This authoritative role would imply that in the biblical marriage it is the husbands responsibility to work, provide, and give leadership while the wife stays home and serves the domestic needs of the family.

    Biblical assumptions aside, the domestic role of the husband has changed every now and then throughout the course of history. There are even differences in the husbands role from culture to culture. The Cambri for example was a society in which the wife was the financial provider. The Mosou of Asia are matrilineal, which means they trace their family lineage through the women in their family.

    Even today we are witnessing a shift in the role of the husband. A recent study shows that 50% of husbands in the United States wouldn't mind staying at home with the kids while the wife goes out and works. That's a dramatic shift from the 1950's image of the working business man who comes home in a suit to food on the table prepared by a Betty Crocker mom who's been cleaning in a dress and heels all day. Going back to assumed gender roles based on scripture, one might wonder just how biblical is the "stay at home dad".

    There is one verse in scripture that is absolutely clear on a husband's responsibility toward his wife.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her.

                                    Ephesians 5:25

    How did Christ love the church? He laid down His life for her, He gave up everything He had for her. The Bible puts it this way:

Who being in very nature God did not consider equality with God something to be used to His own advantage; rather He made Himself nothing taking the very nature of a slave.

                                                                  Philippians 2:6-7

    Christ loved the church by becoming her servant. Now consider the husband who takes upon himself the responsibilities that some say are reserved for the wife. Christ, even though He was king, made Himself a servant to His bride. Stay at home dads serve their wives in the same way. The stay at home dad is not only biblical, he lives God's command to love his wife as Christ loved the Church.

    As we ponder these matters further, let usbe careful not to confuse the teachings of the culture, with the teachings of the Word.

   

Want to be Compared with Christ? Then be a Drunk and Hang Out with Prostitutes

    How cool would it be if someone accused you of being just like Jesus. Think about it. What if people said the same things about you that they said about Jesus? Man, that would boost my ego. Before we get ahead of ourselves and try to start imitating Christ, lets take a look at some of the things people said about Jesus, and see if that's a reputation we all want to strive for.

"The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, 'Behold a gluttonous man and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!'"

                                                                                                  -Matthew 11:19

    I don't know about you, but being a professing Christian and a minister, I don't want people going around saying that I am a drunkard and a glutton. Here's another question. Would we want to be associated with the people that Jesus associated with? Look at this passage.

"Then it happened that as Jesus was reclining at the table in the house, behold, many tax collectors and sinners came and were dining with Jesus and His disciples."

                                                                                                 -Matthew 9:10

    Okay, in the cultural context, who are these "tax collectors" and "sinners"? Given that these titles were given by the religious elite of the day, we can assume that they mean anyone that didn't fit into their little "holier than thou" click. It goes deeper than that however. "Tax collector" referred to a Jew who betrayed his own people and worked for the Romans. This type of person would often take more than they required and take advantage of his own kind. "Sinners" referred to three different groups of people. First, the irreligious Jew, corrupt people and money launderers, and finally the "riff raff" of the town; drunkards, thieves, prostitutes, etc. 

    Like before, I am not sure I want people going around saying that I associate with these people. I don't think many Christians would want the reputation Jesus had. Today He is revered, but during His time on the earth, He had a reputation of being a drunk, running with the wrong crowd, some even called Him demon possessed. I mean, how popular could He be if the people called for His execution? Which begs the question, why in the world would the Son of God bring such an embarrassing reputation on Himself? It all goes with His mission; To seek and save that which was lost

"When the Pharisees saw this, they said to His disciples, 'Why is your teacher eating with tax collectors and sinners?' But when Jesus heard this, He said, 'It is not those who are healthy who need a physician, but those who are sick. But go and learn what this means: 'I desire compassion, and not sacrifice', for I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners.'"

                                                                                            -Matthew 9:11-13

    Jesus did not come to minister to those who had already made themselves right with God. He came for those who were and are, far away from Him. He associated with those who needed Him the most. They were His mission. They were the reason He came to earth. Here is the heart piercing truth; His mission is our mission. Those of us who are Christians have some soul searching to do. Knowing where He went, do we really want to follow Christ? Knowing the reputation He acquired, do we really want to be like Christ?

    At the end of the day, can we expect anything less? They called Him a drunkard and a glutton. They accused Him of hanging out with the scum of society. Then Jesus says this the night before His death;

"If the world hates, you know that it has hated me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, because of this the world hates you. Remember the word that I said to you, 'A slave is not greater than his master'. If they persecuted me, they will also persecute you; if they kept my word, they will keep yours also."

                                                                                                    -John 15:18-20

I leave you with a thought provoking question: What are you doing to bring people to Christ that could cost you your reputation?

    

What REAL Social Justice Looks Like

    While social justice may be the evidence and purpose of our salvation, we must be careful with how we live out this particular aspect of our faith. Understandably, many Christians are turned off by social justice because it implies giving people a hand out. With the original intent of humanity in mind we must realize that true social justice is not just meeting the needs of the poor, but engaging the community and fixing the systems that create an environment where people can become poor.

    Throughout the course of our lives we will encounter people that are in immediate need. We see the unemployment numbers. There is some hope as this number has dropped slightly but we wonder if that is simply because of people pulling out of unemployment. We see hunger growing in our cities. The homeless are increasing in number. Human trafficking has become a problem in this country especially in major cities. Our natural Christian reaction is to help these people and immediately meet their needs, and rightfully we should. If we are not careful however, we will merely be be treating a cough when the REAL problem is the virus creating this symptom. There is a system that is creating this environment that we must address.

    These "systems" lie in the different spheres of influence in the community. There indeed are many systems that need to be addressed in order to create an environment where people flourish and prosper instead of live in destitution. Two that are of significance are the education system and the family. We have allowed these systems to essentially break down. When the education system is built on the principle of how can being educated makes me look better, or gives me a higher status in society, there is no practical relevant skills acquired and the community suffers. When the priorities of schools is extra curricular activities and "national ranking", students lack the resources to be sufficiently prepared. Whatever happened to ensuring that students are on the appropriate reading level, computer literate, or possessing essential life skills in order be productive in society? I guess standardized testing to ensure that the school and its teachers scores go up took it's place.

    The family is such an essential sphere of influence in the community. In fact, the family is a community, society, and civilization in its most simplest basic form. This has huge implications. Whatever the health and stability of the average family in the community, so will be the health and stability of the community as a whole. The family will be a microcosm of what the community looks like.

    If the family is divided, so will the community. If the family is a place of favoritism of one and the shunning of the other, the community will be that way too. If the family is a haven for abuse, violence, and neglect, the community will certainly not be a safe place. If the average family in the community doesn't know how to responsibly handle their finances.... get the picture yet?

    We must engage these two systems and fix them. Its our job! God has entrusted us with the responsibility of governing this planet and bringing His dominion of peace, equality, and justice to earth. We lost that leadership ability at the fall, granted. But Jesus restored us back to that position by His death and resurrection. We are entrusted with building a society on God's behalf. What are we doing to engage and restore the education system in our community? How are we healing and restoring families that are broken?

    Lets build up homeless shelters for those with no roof, set up food pantries for those with no food, and establish a safe house for those trapped in human trafficking, but we absolutely can not stop there. We must engage the community and fix the systems that created an environment that allowed these atrocities to occur in the first place. That is REAL Social Justice.